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[25 Oct 2003|09:11pm] [ mood | bitchy ] Now my friends only writing journal. Comment to be added. Sarah. + if i hurt you then i'm sorry please don't think that this was easy + 4 never listened to me

why can i never do anything? [22 Oct 2003|09:18pm] [ mood | annoyed ] Grr. So I have a new journal: _sentimental. Add it if you want. Only we're having a few teething problems [read: my computer sucks]. So I'll have to stay here for the while until I go to the library tomorrow and use the internet there [if I can] because this pile of shit is fucking about all over the place. So. Today it's cold again. 1 never listened to me

time sure has changed you. [21 Oct 2003|06:48pm] [ mood | awkward ] [ music | till the tide creeps in -- the thrills ] A phone ringing. A dog howling. Then, across the lurid bay, the city is silent. It's like you were never here. A plane roaring. A ship cutting gracefully through the awkward waves. Long hot summer days mean nothing once the winter comes. And once again, you're never here. Trust me: Without you the sun Would never bother rising. I sit and wonder. listened to me

and your eyes, broken windows when you cry. [21 Oct 2003|04:55pm] [ mood | i love the way i never get it quite right ] [ music | good day to die -- travis ] David looked good today. He did. His girlfriend was off, so Rachel and I sat with him and Jamie for lunch. I'm nervous around him but it's not unsettling. Actually, I saw his girlfriend on Saturday, on the train. I got the Kirkby train instead of the Southport train from Central because I wasn't concentrating, so when I got to Kirkby I had to get another train back down to Sandhills and change onto the Southport train. But anyway, when I got on at Sandhills his girlfriend and Jack were on there together. It got me thinking: if you were going out with someone like David, why spend time with someone like Jack? But who am I to judge anyway. So. Went to see the school production of Joseph... last night. It was ok, only it has songs that stick in your head like glue. Rachel was the baker. She had a solo. In the interval I was hanging round with Christian who is just fantastic. And some guy called Kershaw but I don't know who he is/was. Came home, called Bea, wrote. Very productive night. Over half term, for English, I have to read and review a book. She gave us a list of suggestions today in class and split them up into a list for 'Boys' and a list for 'Girls'. I was very offended since the two books I was planning to read [Animal Farm, Of Mice And Men] were both on the Boys' list, as was Catch 22 and 1984, which I'm re-reading at the moment. And the girls' list was made up of Jane Eyre and Fallen Leaves etc. so I complained to my teacher, even though she's nice. I just thought it was a bit stereotypical, that's all. Then I had to play Laura's stoned daughter in a talk show. I was quite good at it though, even if I do say so myself. Charlotte came back at lunch today. She's been off for a few weeks with Glandular Fever. I've come to the conclusion that I don't like her. Half term starts tomorrow. Very happy about this. We're maybe going to the Isle of Man for the weekend, though I don't know why or if it's certain. Then next week is Northampton which I'm half looking forward to, half not. I've had California Dreamin' in my head all day. It reminds me of being in Barcelona. We were driving down those long streets that are split into three and are lined with trees, and Alex put on some CD he'd got free with a Sunday paper. It had that on it and also Dancing In The Streets. Bea said 'This song reminds me of you every time I hear it'. It's cold again. And this song is another one of those that remind me of Autumn afternoons spent reading. ( Stolen.. ) 4 never listened to me

[20 Oct 2003|07:08pm] [ mood | we've got broadband now. ] [ music | new found mass 200 -- the get up kids ] A window filled with Rain. My one comforting thought: We'll watch same sunsets. 6 never listened to me

and you know i'm not one for complaining. [20 Oct 2003|04:59pm] [ mood | cold ] [ music | great romances of the 20th century -- taking back sunday ] An interesting weekend. Friday night was bad. Very. Kim texted me saying she was at Yardley, waiting for supper, and that she missed me and Robson said hi and stuff. Bad. I just started crying really hysterically, then my mum came in and we talked but it didn't really help. I'm not making a plea for help or saying that I am a long-term depressive -- I just get like that sometimes. I just think that I should have been there for that weekend. Saturday was good, though. Went into town. I couldn't find a copy of Down and Out... so brought Great Expectations/Oliver Twist as a poor consolation. I don't plan to read either -- it's just a nice-looking book and it cost just £1 so it's justified. Also brought: envelopes, dividers for my history file, these cute clip things for notelets and stuff -- mine are, of course, holding up photos and a caramel slice from the Walker cafe. Oh, and I also brought small print from the Walker -- Super Star Fucker -- Andy Warhol Text by Peter Davies. Very cool. Very me. Then Saturday evening I took my sister to see Finding Nemo. It was cute. We got popcorn and on the way home I brought us chips. We came home and watched The Big Read. The list was OK. I worked out that we have around 50 of what are supposedly the Nation's top 100 books. Quite impressive, I suppose, except not really considering we have around 1000 books, not counting the ones stored in our basement. But anyway. I've compiled a list of books I want to read now. My dad has all of them as well, which is good. Yesterday was so nice. Autumn weather. Lovely, lovely autumn weather. I love Autumn. So I made a mixtape for Sadie and then read. Also rang Kim and talked to her for a long time. It was fun. She told me that everytime she sees Robson she thinks of me. Ah, on the weekend she was in a section with Mr Wharton, Mr Lunn, Parker, Gilkes and Robson. You cannot understand the injustice of that. Especially since I would've been in that section if I'd been there since Parker always picked me to be in his section because we had a special patrol dance we did together. But enough of that. I love Taking Back Sunday. And I haven't listened to them for so long. It's a shame. Neil and Louise are 'on a break'. That phrase always reminds me of Friends. Anyway my sister is now screaming at me to get off the computer so I should go I suppose before I burst an eardrum or something. 6 never listened to me

you never stop loving someone. [17 Oct 2003|04:22pm] [ mood | embarrassed ] [ music | birthday weekend -- antifreeze ] So. Full marks on my history essay and A and A* on my last two pieces of writing for French. I get the feeling I'm doing pretty well at school so far this year. Anyway. The weekend's here again. I'm pleased. Tomorrow I might go shopping -- last night I had the urge to go to the old second hand book shop near Lime Street station and buy a copy of Down and Out In London and Paris [I've just started rereading Nineteen Eighty Four]. Then I want to spend the afternoon/evening in bed, reading, shutters closed, heating on. And pretend that stuff doesn't happen. I found out today that Clara likes David [or, as she calls him, Dave -- ugh, ugh, ugh]. Clara = bitch in my chemistry class who no one likes anyway!! Sorry to judge her because of that, but when she talks about him for the whole seventy minute lesson I get pissed off. But whatever. He's still with his girlfriend [she's too pretty for her own good, for god's sake, it's not fair] and she would have no chance with him anyway. She's too fool-proof. Two strangers in here [that is, the library] are on the exact same chatroom. I wonder if they're talking. Heather's starting to annoy me. I don't want to say that because she's been nice to me and it's not her fault I have such high expectations of what she should be and do, but it's true. I told Laura and she said to just try and avoid her for a while. Maybe I will. After school Jenny and I went and watched the rehearsals for Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcoat for a while. It's this year's school production. Rachel's in it so I'm going to see it on Monday night. Oh my god someone just texted me, and I've realised how embarrassing and loud my ringtone for messages is. Ah, it's so awful and obnoxious!! I have to check who it is. Fucking hell, it was T-fucking-Mobile. I hate them anyway. listened to me

"boredom does strange things to strange people" [15 Oct 2003|05:26pm] YOUR NAME (1) The singular boring question: What is your name? Sarah (2) If you had been born a member of the opposite sex, what would your name have been?: James, after my granddad. (3) Would you name a child of yours after you? No. (4) If you had to switch first names with a friend of yours, who would you switch with? Probably Laura, but I’m not sure. (5) What's the way people most often mispronounce any part of your name? “sare-ra” (6) If you were to become famous, would you drop your last name (like Madonna, Cher, Roseanne)? No. HUMOR (13) How easy is it to make you laugh? Depends on who you are and what mood I’m in. (14) What person you know makes you laugh the most? Bea. (15) Do you laugh at jokes you know you shouldn't? Yes. (16) Do you tell jokes you know you shouldn't? Any joke I tell I shouldn’t – my jokes just don’t work/ (17) What words instantly make you laugh or at least smile? ‘Baboon’ and ‘procrastination’. (18) What do you think is the funniest thing you've ever said or written? Whatever it was it was a long time ago.. MUSIC (19) Do you ever dance to music when nobody's watching? Yes. (20) What is/are the worst song(s) you have ever heard? I don’t have that much spare time. (21) What song(s) do you wish you could understand a little better? I don't know. (22) What song(s) are constantly in your head? Usually what I’ve been listening to a lot or what I’ve just heard someone else singing. (23) What song(s) do you think describe your personality best? Songs like Cute Without the ‘E’… and Vincent. (24) If you were to serenade the object of your affections, which song would you sing? Something he liked. (25) If the object of your affections were to serenade you, what song(s) would you hope he or she used? Message From Kathlene, though that’s not really suitable for serenading, I suppose. MOVIES (26) What movie(s) do you love that nobody else seems to? I’m not sure, but I hate a lot of films that everyone else loves. (27) Do you agree with the idea that sequels are always worse than the original? Yes, probably, though there are exceptions/ (28) Who's your favorite Star Wars character? Have to admit I’ve never watched a Star Wars film in my life. (29) What kind of movie do you think there should be more of? Waking Ned. Sorry, it was the first film that came into my head. (30) What movie(s) do you simply not understand the appeal of? Just Married and The Matrix. FOOD (31) When eating, are you more concerned with taste or healthiness? Taste in the short term. (32) What's your favorite kind of cheese? I like the Austrian cheese that looks like sausages, and also Wensleydale with cranberries. (33) What do you think your answer to the previous question reveals about your personality? That I don’t like many cheese-y cheeses? (34) If you knew exactly what went into Chinese food, hamburger meat, etc., would you still eat it? Probably yes. I have low morals like that. (35) Do you ever feel guilty eating meat? No. COMPUTERS (36) Mac or PC? PC (37) How much do you actually care about the inner workings of your computer, as long as it works? No (38) Do you ever begin preferring IMs to other forms of conversation? Yes. (39) Do you find you're different talking through IMs than face-to-face or on the telephone? Of course. (40) Have you ever ended bid on something on eBay and regretted it later? No. THE BATTLE OF THE SEXES (41) Have you ever wished you could experience being the other gender? Yes, but only sometimes. (42) What do you love most about the other gender? Nice looks combined with a good personality. Haha. (43) What do you dislike most about the other gender? The way they fuck me up. (44) What do you understand least about the other gender? How sometimes they don’t realise just how beautiful they are. CELEBRITIES (45) Do you sometimes see a movie or watch a show just because a good-looking celebrity is in it? Yes/ (47) Have people ever said you looked like a celebrity, and if so, who? No. Well, apart from Lassie, but everyone’s heard that joke, right? (48) If there was to be a movie about you, who do you think should play you (in personality, looks or both)? I’d like to think someone like Lisa Kudrow, though we look nothing like each other. (49) Does it ever annoy you when you know someone is a celebrity but you can't remember why? Not particularly. (50) If you could enter any celebrity's mind like in "Being John Malkovich", whose would you enter? I don’t know. (51) Do you want to be John Malkovich? Can’t say I do, no. NUMBERS (52) Do you laugh when you hear or read the number 69? No but I always think funny thoughts. (53) Were you lying about your answer to the previous question? No. (54) Do you actually know your Social Security Number? Do I actually have one?? (55) Do you actually know your IP address? No. (56) Do you know what an IP address is? No. (57) Do you know the four-character extension on your ZIP code? No. (58) Ever thought there were too many numbers floating around in our lives? Not until now. (59) Does your head begin to hurt when you think of infinity, imaginary numbers, irrational numbers, etc.? Yes. (60) What do you think of pi? It’s long? LOVE, SEX AND ALL THAT (61) Did you get a little frightened or uncomfortable seeing this as a section title? No. (62) If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest in dating you, how would you feel? Like I always do. (63) Do you prefer getting to know someone first before dating them or going in "blind"? Getting to know them. (64) Could you carry on a relationship with someone with the same first name as a family member? Yes. (65) Have you ever wished it was more "socially acceptable" for a girl to ask a guy out? I don’t really take any notice. (66) What's your opinion on sex without emotional commitment? Um. (67) Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive? Not really. (68) Do you think the opposite sex finds you good-looking? No. (69) Would you be willing to give up sex in exchange for an emotional commitment you knew would last? I’d ask to have them both.  (70) Do you think the number of the last question was a coincidence? Oh very funny. POSSESSIONS (71) What is your favorite possession? I’m not sure. I have a few. (72) What physical, tangible possession do you want most? More clothes and some more CDs would be nice. And Photo Frames!! (73) How badly do you want it? Not that badly. (74) Have you ever seen 'The Exorcist'? No. (75) How long did it take you to understand why the last question is in this section? I’m still trying to.. HOLIDAYS (76) Does Christmas music too far away from Christmas annoy you? Yes!! (77) How old do you think you will be before you stop liking getting older? I like getting older. (78) What was the best Halloween costume you ever had? I’ve always been a witch on Halloween. (79) What was the worst Halloween costume you ever had? See above? (80) What holiday do you think has still managed to retain its original meaning? There isn’t really one anymore. (81) There are currently no federal holidays during August- what should be put there? National August day? MEMORIES (82) How good is your short-term memory? Depends on what I’m trying to remember. (83) How good is your long-term memory? Quite good. (84) What is your earliest memory? Being on the back of my mum’s bike in Holland. (85) What is one of your happiest memories? I have a lot. (86) What is your strangest memory? Waking up sliding down a hill in a sleeping bag over the summer, I think. (87) What song, movie, etc. do you wish you could memorize? I know most of my favourite movies by heart, which is sad. (88) What movie makes/made you cry? Castaway, when he loses Wilson. (89) What book makes/made you cry? The one I’ve just finished - If Nobody Speaks of Remarkable Things - and others. (90) What song makes/made you cry? Too many. (91) What makes/made you laugh so hard you cried? Something funny at the time. THREE TRULY RANDOM QUESTIONS (92) Would you like to be cloned? I don’t know. Probably not. It’s a weird thought, and the world could probably do without another me around. (93) Do you wish you could be alive when the world was ending, just to experience it? Yes, (94) Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango? I can indeed, thank you for asking. THIS SURVEY (95) Do you think that one hundred and one questions is too long? Oh sometimes it’s fun to do long and boring stuff., (96) Do you think the one hundred interesting questions actually were interesting? Apart from that Queen one just gone and the one about the Exorcist – I’m still trying to work that out. I guess you have to see the film/ (97) Are you sorry you began filling it out? No. (98) What question do you wish it had asked? I don’t know. (99) How would you have answered it? If I’d thought of one then yes. THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT QUESTIONS (100) When was the last time you let the people you love know you love them? I can’t remember. (101) What do you want the people who are reading this survey to know? That I am bored and my back hurts. Thank you. I make no apologies for not using the cut. listened to me

i've been on top of the world since about one week ago, marking the time when i was drunk enough.. [15 Oct 2003|04:48pm] [ mood | achey ] [ music | clavicle -- alkaline trio ] ..to talk to you. I got the results from my history retest today: 100%! How jammy am I? I get my essay on Sarajevo, 1914 back on Friday as well. I think I did that quite well so I'm pleased. We've got an assessment next Wednesday which I'm not worrying about yet -- I'm probably aiming for an A or B. Nothing happened today. Well, I've just been to the dentist which was fun and exciting as always. I hate it when they scrape your teeth with that pointy things -- it makes you feel like you're going to walk out of there with no teeth left! I sat on the beach last night and wrote. I must have been there an hour, maybe more. Sometimes I can get a bit carried away if I just get caught up in something. But the end result was quite good so I'm not making excuses for myself. I have some good quotes for you all: "No snowflake in the avalanche ever feels responsible." "We must believe in luck. How else can we explain the victories of our enemies?" "It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value" and, "It is not the strongest of the species who survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most adaptable to change." I don't know who said them all but I quite liked them. I need some new photo frames. Donations are always accepted. 4 never listened to me

[14 Oct 2003|04:41pm] I forgot, it's nice weather today. Might just stuff my Sociology homework and go to the beach. listened to me

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